From Fear Can Come Much Faith…

“Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.”  ~Marie Curie

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We’re all afraid sometimes. It’s part of the human condition. Rational fears of a real danger mobilize to positive action. But fears of imagined threats can be destructive and immobilize to exhaustion. We deal with both as we move along our day-to-day path. And it’s helpful to understand what it is we’re dealing with.

A few years ago, I was in a serious car wreck caused by a driver making an illegal turn in front of my car at an intersection. My foot immediately slammed on the brake. Panic and fear gripped my senses, and I couldn’t stop screaming until impact suddenly stopped my car. I spent 4 days in the hospital and 2 months in a nursing home for rehab. I went from a wheelchair to a walker and then a cane. Yes, real dangers need positive action. But fears we conjure up in our minds take their toll in unnecessary stress and worry.

So what are you afraid of? What scares you? Does your mind sometimes drift into “what if” thinking, and you function from a state of fear? What if…I don’t get the job, I make a mistake, this person leaves me, I get sick again, I look foolish, my plan doesn’t work. What if…what if….  It doesn’t get you anywhere, does it? But we all do it.

“Faith and Fear both demand you believe in something you cannot see. You choose.”  ~Bob Proctor

We can’t see into the future, so everything in life is unpredictable. Caution is useful, but fear of the unknown can become a damaging habit. Usually, it begins with doubt, then you worry, and then fear sets in. Can you imagine how much negative energy you’re pouring into a situation? You’re already contaminating it. And your mind has chosen that route. But you have the power to choose freedom.

An effective way to stop a fear habit is to replace it with a habit of faith. And that takes some monitoring of your thinking patterns. Once you identify your doubt, worry, and fear, then you can do something about it. When you feel that first bit of discomfort in the pit of your stomach, go inside and clarify your feelings, honestly. And begin confronting those feelings.

“Don’t be afraid of change, because it is leading you to a new beginning.” ~Joyce Meyer

I’m a believer in denials and affirmations to change our feelings about something. We can’t deny our emotions, but we can deny them any power over us. Pull the fear up to the surface and talk to it like you would another person. “Okay, fear, I know you’re there. But I deny you have any power over me. You’re no bigger than a fly on a horse’s rump, so you might as well go away. I’m done with you.” Then affirm the truth about the situation. “I release you now and affirm my freedom from you through the real Power of faith within me. I am a precious child of the Universe, untouched by your mischief. So get out of my life.” Use whatever words you’re comfortable with, but be firm in your faith, faith in the truth of who you are.

Ridding yourself of unwanted emotions isn’t easy, and it takes practice. But as time passes, you’ll feel a shift of courage within you, and you’ll smile. As Maya Angelou says, “Courage is fear that has said its prayers.” Not every situation in your life will turn out the way you want it, but you can avoid those negative feelings, and walk your path with courage and faith. It’s like having a tool in your pocket when your human self gets in the way of your sacred Self. Life is not for living in fear. It’s for learning and growing and feeling happy.

I wish you faith-filled walks through each experience in your life.

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Author, Marilyn Fowler

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Recognizing And Healing Your Loneliness.

Hello Friends, Readers and Welcome All,

It’s ironic…the subject I chose for today’s blog post. Last night I lost my brother. He passed away and left a hole in my heart that will need to heal. It’s never easy, but now I’ll have to experience my loneliness, let it be for a while, and then let it go. I love you, my brother, and I’ll miss you always.

“To transform the emptiness of loneliness to the fullness of aloneness. Ah, that is the secret of life.”
~Sunita Khosla

We all know what loneliness feels like. But each of us perceives this emotion in our own unique way. Some even equate loneliness with being alone. But the two are different. Loneliness is suffering, while solitude of itself is simply being alone and need not create loneliness. It may sound strange, but both can offer opportunities for self-discovery and personal growth.

Loneliness involves a sense of loss and/or separation, and may come from many sources; loss of a loved one, divorce, the empty nest, illness, isolation, rejection, loss of a job, retirement, etc. Maybe you’ve always been lonely, and you don’t know why. It just feels like a piece of your heart is missing. For some people, loneliness is the result of a childhood experience that left them feeling unloved and alone.


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When I was 6 years old, my father died, and it left a hole in my heart that was filled with loneliness. For most of my life, I suspected that was where my loneliness came from and I fought it, even though I knew that resisting something strengthens its presence. Then a couple of years ago, I was so tired of the fight, I just let it be and looked for a way to let it go. That’s when I found an EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) practitioner who helped me release it. I will always miss my father, but I no longer feel that deep pain I lived with for so many years. from this experience my inner child learned that she’s okay with her daddy’s arms around her, and I became freer to be me.

We live in two worlds, the inner and the outer, and we can find help in the outer. But the letting go must ultimately come from within. Accept your loneliness as where you are now. Then it’s no longer your enemy, but a possible step to something new and wonderful. Loneliness can bring a letting go of old ways and limiting beliefs; it can lead to freedom and purpose; and it can be used to transform your life.

Sometimes when a person is lonely, they’re afraid to be alone. But alone time can help free you from loneliness. It can be a time to get to know yourself better, and find ways to release your loneliness. Give yourself what alone time you need.


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1. Determine the reason for your loneliness. What loss have you experienced in your life? Tangible or intangible? Is it from your childhood? When did it happen?

2. It’s important to allow yourself to grieve your loss and accept, yes accept, where you are now. The pain may be deep, but give it the time you need to feel your feelings. Don’t fight loneliness. Let it be for now.

3. When you’re ready to release the loneliness, use intention with commitment. Find help in the outer and ways within to let it go. Talk to your loneliness, tell it how you feel, give it permission to leave. Bless it with peace, and release it.

4. Ask yourself what you can learn from this experience. How can you grow from it?

5. Use this time alone to go within and communicate with Spirit–you have never been separated from this inner love and comfort. Then reach out to others with love from your heart. Loneliness will have nowhere to live, and it will leave you.

You are not that wounded child you feel inside. Understanding what a glorious creation you are, in spite of your losses from whatever source, can leave you free to experience the love, joy, and peace that have always been yours to claim.

I wish you love and peace in your heart. XOXO

*Marilyn Fowler, Author*
My 5 Star Amazon Reviews Of “Silent Echoes” A Self Help Book

Discover Your Voice …

Hello and Welcome Friends, Readers, and New Visitors,

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I got used to Mama waking me up every night when she came reeling in from the bar where she worked. My small hands held the bucket for her sick stomach until there was no more sick to come up. Then we laid back in bed, and I listened to her unload her stories of better times and cry her tears for deep wounds that could never heal. She talked about the orphanage, her brother’s tragic death, happy years with my father until we lost everything in the Depression, and the urine smell in the county hospital where he died.

I heard her stories in detail. She missed my father. I tried to comfort her. But how could I help? My empty heart missed him too. I was a child alone with silent screams that no one heard. And I didn’t know what to do with my own hurt. I stuffed it down and pretended it wasn’t there. But it hurt too much. So I learned to release it on paper. I discovered my voice. Poems I wrote in my teens during dark times when I wondered if I would survive–others in my 30s when survival meant searching to find my way in a dim future–old diaries and short stories–my memoir, Silent Echoes. And finally a world I now see with clearer vision. I find my voice, my Self, in my writing, and I know I’m not alone. My life has meaning.

If you ask me what I came here to do, I, an artist, will answer you: I am here to live out loud. Emile Zola

Your voice, when expressed, reveals the essence of who you are, and validates your connection to the world. And your life has meaning. Your voice can be expressed as a talent, like artwork, music, sewing, cooking, or simply acts of kindness in everyday living. My niece is wheelchair bound with multiple sclerosis. She smiles and waves to everyone. This is her voice, her true Self, that brings joy to others. I knew a man who repaired bicycles for neighborhood children. In the Depression years people shared food. And I know people today who simply answer the call to purpose in whatever way they’re moved to express. For me, its in my writing.

Challenges are what make life interesting, and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.  Anne Nwakama.

You may feel there’s no meaning in suffering. But the way we deal with it determines its meaning. I used to curse my depression, but it led me to many happy years working as a Psychotherapist. I had a patient with chronic pain who saw no meaning in his life until he discovered, through therapy, he could lie on the ground, dig with one hand, and grow a beautiful garden. He was happy when he brought me a lily plant he’d grown and told me of sharing his plants with others. His suffering led him to his true Self, and so in itself was meaningful.

What is your voice expressing in your life? It may go unnoticed, expressed in un-awareness. But you can find it. Pay attention to your words and actions, and notice the pattern. Then experience the joy of meaningful expression. Your life matters.

I wish you joy in discovery and fulfillment in expression.

Happiness & Blessings,

Marilyn
http://www.amazon.com/Silent-Echoes-Marilyn-Fowler/dp/1432749498

 

Hello. Welcome to my New Blog Home, The Self-Help Road To Freedom.

Hello and Welcome New Friends,

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       We’re all on a very important journey, our life journey. And as we travel this journey, we take many roads, some positive and some negative. With this blog, we can travel together on our positive self-help road and find ways to overcome the painful physical, mental, and/or emotional challenges that invade our life, and learn to replace them with the love, peace, validation, and freedom we long for on our journey.
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On a self-help road you take a look at your life everyday. You keep what serves you and learn to release what doesn’t serve you. That takes some inner and outer work. And you’re the only one who can do it. That’s why it’s called self-help. It’s up to you. But you don’t have to do it alone. There’s more help on your journey than you may now realize.

Inner work involves introspection, looking inside at your thoughts and feelings, sorting out what’s in there. You decide what you want to release, what you want to keep, or what you want to create within yourself. Then you use techniques to accomplish positive change. This can be a cleansing experience, and you just might discover how really wonderful you are.

Outer work is finding tools outside yourself to help promote positive change. Sometimes you’ll get “aha” moments from something you see or hear. These could be advice from a trusted friend, a book that reveals enlightenment, talking with someone who’s been there, a new doctor who can help you, etc. Or you might receive comfort from simply sharing your pain with someone who truly hears you and cares.

If you’re a person who follows a spiritual life, that can be your greatest asset. But sometimes pain reduces motivation to practice the very spiritual activities you want to maintain. That’s where love and understanding from others helps keep you on your path. And that’s where a self-help attitude helps you stay in touch with that spiritual essence that shines within you. God speaks, and self-help encourages you to listen.

This road is bumpy at times, and sometimes difficult. But a happy journey is worth it. And like I said, you don’t have do it alone. On this blog, I’ll be writing once each week on all sorts of topics, problems, and challenges. Some of these will come from my own experience, thoughts and feelings, but many will be from your comments, your feedback, your concerns.  So keep those coming.  Let’s travel our self-help road together and help each other.
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So remember me, as I’m here for you, to help you through those rough & bumpy patch’s in life.
I wish you a most productive and blessed self-help road to Life Freedom …

Much happiness & Blessings, Marilyn
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Silent Echoes

My current book titled; Silent Echoes
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